Fallout 3 - The art of doing it wrong

As may have been gathered, AWB has a little bit of time for the Fallout universe and has recently been playing a bit of Fallout 3.
Now as we know, Fallout 3 does have a storyline. A deep and involved quest to, well, go and do boring stuff in search of your character's dad and save the world. Or something. And yes we all know just how much we want to do that constantly when there are other things we can do in the game.
First up, we need to remind you that the Fallout universe is a dangerous place. Take for example some of the animals you can find...

Take for example this friendly looking creature. On the plus side your character is currently safely hidden, which is probably a good thing as, based on the size of the rifle you are holding, that puppy is HUGE. Let's just hope all he really wants is to chase the stick.
Not to fear, the Wasteland isn't all scary animals. There are actually some nice friendly people and a touch of romance. Take this young lady...

This is Angela and she is clearly very happy as she is currently getting married. Yes, that man in the sharp knitted vest is a priest and the guy in the right foreground her hubby to be.
Just ignore the honking great big knife in her right hand, okay. There is probably a perfectly rational reason with nothing at all to do with her landing her hubby by using ant queen pheromones for a bit of casual date rape.
Nope, this is Fallout 3 after all. Fallout 3 is a nice universe. After all what other game version would take such a strong view on harming children?
Cannibalism on the other hand...

Well thank you Old Man Harris, we are glad you cleared that up.
Still, Fallout 3, unlike earlier games, prevents you from actually harming any character under the age of 16, which is probably the only reason this charming little fella isn't currently a red smear across the pavement...

Remind us again why we are helping you, you ungrateful little brat?
Still, the one advantage with Bryan, for that is his name, is that near the start of the quest involving giant fire breathing ants that he begs you to help him with, he chooses to hide inside a shelter for safety.
One of these in fact...

Cosy looking aren't they?
And the big advantage of him decided to go hide in one, is that unless you decided to formally speak to him again and close the quest, the lovable little scamp gets to remain in there.
Not that it really effects the game, but walking past him from time to time to hear his slightly distressed cries does have a strange satisfaction.
As does other actions within the game. Fallout is a universe that contains teddy bears, and let's face it, what game universe would be complete without them. In fact there are large numerous amounts of teddy bears located within the game, and if you are careful enough with your searching, you can have a small picnic with a few them...

Don't worry. You can still fit on the bed. It is all completely safe.
Also completely safe in Fallout is starting a small fire from time to time...

Here is one we started earlier. Nothing to worry about. All perfectly under control. What could possibly go wrong...

Quite.

Civilization V (or, 'are you really stupid or just programmed that way?')

AWB has been playing Civ V recently, as you do. Or more correctly 'as you do when you should be doing something else instead of collection Steam Achievements'.
In this game, like most of the other Civ franchise, the AI nations are given vaguely historical personalities. In theory this means they will act towards you in an historical and realist manner. In practise it means they will constantly heckle, insult, belittle and finally, if they think they can get away with it, invade you regardless of how friendly and agreeable you attempt to play your nation. Be passive and they call you a wimp. Active and you become a hideous expansionist who dared to settle near their boarders.
What can one do? Parabellum.
So, AWB is playing and into the end game. Everything is going nicely, the cities are growing and the only real question is will the Science or Culture victories tick over first.
Up turns the Japanese ambassador to exchange friendlies.
"Your nation is puny and weak! It is a wonder you have not been overrun by barbarians!"
(or words to that effect)
"Well excuse me Mister Fancy Pants. If you had been paying attention, WE have spilt the atom and have satellites in orbit. You on the other hand have finally worked out that black goo you find on the ground can be used as a fuel and still think sitting on the back of a horse is a pretty cool idea."
So, we nuked them.
Three times.
This is also the Gods and Kings expansion, which brings (in AWB opinion to the vast improvement of the game) religion back into the game system. True it is another stat to micromanage but if you were not into a little micro management you probably wouldn't be playing Civ.
While this does a lot of new things within the game, the prime thing is allowing construction of Missionary units which roam the map doorknocking on your cities door and asking if you wish to talk about the Word of Great Xhara'clu the Destroyer when you are trying to cook dinner. Normally these units are just annoying, yet at times of war they become flagged as legitimate enemy targets and hence, if you play your cards right, allow you to sometimes be rewarded with the following...
"Your Guided Missile has attacked an enemy Missionary and Destroyed it".
Come on, let's be honest, we have all really really wanted to see that in our lives at one time.